How do I analyse the passage to find where the writer is using language and structure to build tension?

While looking at the passage, let's look at what type of language the writer has chosen to use: have they used short/long words, is the structure of the passage regular/consistent, are the words powerful/direct or descriptive/vague, is the language colloquial? For example, do you think tension is created through short phrases here and here? Is there a tense tone to the passage where this paragraph is built up of short, sharp words in comparison to this paragraph?