GCSE and A-Level exams can be incredibly stressful for your teen and it can be tough to know how to support them. Finding a balance between nagging them and giving them space can feel a bit like walking on thin ice.
Here, we go straight to the source and ask 12 MyTutor tutors how their parents and guardians supported them during exams. From what really helped to what annoyed or stressed them out, here are their biggest do’s and dont’s on how to be supportive during exams.
Do…
1. Ease off making me do chores
“It was really helpful as I was able to dedicate time to my revision plan and timetable. I simply showed the revision timetable to my parents and they agreed to let me off doing a lot of my chores for the six weeks around my exams.” – Merissa, a MyTutor Maths, Science and English tutor.
2. Motivate me with food
“For me, it was important that my parents didn’t add to the stress, and were kind around this period. My mom made me my favourite dishes and gave me my favourite snacks during revision and exam season. Asian parents don’t really tend to show a lot of affection, but food is the way for them to show that they really care and love us.” – Siman, a MyTutor Maths tutor.
3. Respect my boundaries
“My parents listened to me, respected my boundaries and my moods, and helped when I asked. They supported me by taking some of the mental load by helping to distract me and talking to me about things that weren’t exams sometimes.” – Naveena, a MyTutor Chemistry, Biology, and Economics tutor.
4. Help me prioritise sleep
“I maintained a healthy sleep schedule with my parents’ support. They checked up on me every evening if I was staying up too late revising and eventually we agreed that I should aim to wrap up my revision at about 8pm each evening, so I could spend the rest of the time before bed unwinding.” – Joe, a MyTutor History, Spanish and English tutor.
5. Help me dial up the self-care
“My mum gave me a break on my chores and told me to spend that extra time going on walks and doing exercise to take a break. My mum would also make sure I was drinking and eating enough. She would give me a pep talk every exam day and tell me to just do my best and my revision would pay off.
“It was nice to be taken care of, and given that support for self-care as this can be such an afterthought during exams. I also appreciated the pep talks as I was very self-critical during my time at school.” – Lenaee, a MyTutor Maths and Science tutor.
6. Allow me to process a bad exam
“My family made me come and sit at the table to eat dinner with them. Having an hour away from my desk and being with my family without thinking about revision really helped. However, I wish they would have understood that feeling upset over a bad exam is valid and you’re allowed to feel a bit sorry for yourself. Especially, if you’ve worked hard revising and then the exam doesn’t go as planned.” – Georgia, a MyTutor Maths and Science tutor.
7. Support me with my revision techniques
“My parents helped me go through my revision cards and tested me on what I could remember. They would also encourage me to talk through anything I didn’t understand – I started to understand it better just by talking about it with them.
“It was annoying at the time, but I’ve realised now was actually really helpful, they made me make a revision plan and made sure I stuck to it by offering little rewards for every milestone I completed.” – Emma, a MyTutor English and Maths tutor.
8. Encourage me to take breaks
“I wish they’d encouraged me to take more breaks, as I used to study non-stop, especially for GCSE exams, and I didn’t let myself take enough time off.” – Anjali, a MyTutor Geography, Sociology and Science tutor.
Don’t…
9. Make me feel like I might let you down
“My parents didn’t say this, but family friends often said: ‘Well, we all know/everyone knows that you’re going to do well”. This seems like a nice, encouraging statement but often made me feel pressured and at risk of letting others down.” – Briony, a MyTutor English and Public Speaking tutor.
10. Constantly pester me about revision
“My parents asked me how revision was going a bit too often. I hated thinking about revision all the time, so bringing it up all of the time added extra stress.” – Isobel, a MyTutor English and Science tutor.
11. Trivialise my experience
“My parents told me: ‘I’m sure you’ll be fine’. While it was nice to have reassurance, sometimes hearing it from someone who isn’t going through the same thing as you was a bit meaningless.” – Alice, a MyTutor Maths tutor.
12. Compare me to my sibling or peers
“I wish my parents had put less pressure on me in comparison to my siblings or other people in my year, especially when comparing my time spent revising. I burn out quite easily when revising, but I use the time I have effectively.
“Other people may be able to revise for much longer periods of time, but it doesn’t necessarily translate into better results.” – Joe, a MyTutor History, Spanish and English tutor.
Thinking more about how to be supportive during exams? Take it from these tutors – striking a balance between active involvement and giving them space is key.
If your teen could do with more revision tips and tricks, our tutors are study experts who did the same exams as them in the past few years. Find the right tutor for them here.